It's Just A Memory

It's just a memory of all that we could have been...


This morning on the bus in to work, I was talking to my mum.. We both get the bus in to the city together on most mornings.. Mornings that we are both ready, and sometimes one of us is lazier than the other and takes longer, so we go separately..

Anyway, upon talking to her, she asked me what's been playing on my mind lately.. Talking to her most of the time, brings back memories of things from the past.. Be it about my childhood, things she has done for me, the way I've acted to her sometimes, my love life, my car, and all sorts of things..

I went through one of them quiet "stare out the window" moments for a bit on the bus when the conversation stopped briefly.. I remembered about this one person.. This particular girl.. The moments I had shared, the moments I wish I could share again.. I remembered how, when she'd be around, she'd be the most beautiful thing I could see around me.. How every moment felt so perfect, and meant so much to me.. How, whenever I'd be about to see her, I'd get butterflies in my stomach.. How, whenever I'd even think about the plans coming up ahead, I'd get that feeling..

And then, I remembered the sad times.. The missed chances, the missed memories, the "what if's".. The end, and how it all came crashing down.. How it is all gone, all past, all history.. All memories..

There's this girl right.. I had her, and when I did have her, it just felt so right and so good.. Just looking into her eyes, the feeling of her body, the sound of her voice.. That perfume that just made me melt.. Her style, her class, her charm.. Just everything around her took me in, took a hold of me.. And I couldn't go back..

I wish I could have that again, or atleast some of that again.. Some of the fun, the feelings, the memories.. I wonder what she is doing right now.. I wonder if she'll ever see this, and know..

I might write more on it later..